When “STARS” Fall – Suicide Awareness

Disclaimer – Today’s post is nowhere close to be a “hunky dory” affair! Unlike my usual self, today, I will be talking about hard facts, distressing depression and suicides!

TRIGGER WARNING – This article, or pages it links to, contains images and information about suicide which may be upsetting to some people.

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It’s been a while that I have been meaning to write about this. But thanks (no thanks) to my allergies, terrible teeth ailment and being constantly under the effects of antibiotics and painkillers, I somehow wasn’t able to muster the courage and strength to write about such a “sensitive” topic. Well, the “final nail in the coffin” was yesterday’s news, that once again shook the world. “Kate Spade – who created an iconic, accessible handbag line that bridged Main Street and high-end fashion, hanged herself in an apparent suicide Tuesday at her Manhattan apartment.” 
Ah, another sad demise! Another life, lost too soon! Another painful reminder that we never truly know another’s pain or the burden they carry! *shudders in a corner*

Well, this got me into thinking and I went all “Google” on my research. Here is a list of 7 famous people who ended their own lives (and this is just the tip of an iceberg!)

1 ROBIN WILLIAMS (AGE 63)

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The brilliant actor took his own life in 2014 by hanging himself in his home in California. After the death, medical reports confirmed that he was battling Parkinson’s disease and dementia. But multiple sources and close friends also confirmed the actor was depressed.

 

 

2 MARILYN MONROE (AGE 36)

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This iconic bombshell died from a probable suicide by taking an overdose of barbiturates, with those close to her saying she was prone to “severe fears and frequent depressions,” as well as “abrupt and unpredictable mood changes.”

 

 

3 KURT COBAIN (AGE 27)

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The famed front-man of American rock band Nirvana died from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in April 1994 at the young age of 27. Cobain had struggled with drug addiction and depression and had fled to a detox center in Los Angles before flying home to Seattle where he took his own life.

 

4 ERNEST HEMINGWAY (AGE 61)

This great American novelist, short story writer, and journalist took his life by shooting himself in the head with his favorite shotgun. But his wife, Mary, initially claimed he shot himself accidentally while cleaning the dangerous weapon. In an interview five years later, she admitted he had committed suicide.

 

5 AMY WINEHOUSE (AGE 27)

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The famous award-winning British singer-songwriter, known for her deep, expressive contralto vocals and her eclectic mix of musical genres, including soul – died of alcohol poisoning plus bulimia at her house in London. She literally “drank herself to her death.”

 

 

6 CHESTER BENNINGTON (AGE 41)

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Chester Bennington, the ferocious lead singer for the platinum-selling hard rock band Linkin Park, was found dead in his home near Los Angeles. The star died of suicide by hanging. Reason attributed to alcohol and drug abuse and life long history of depression.

 

 

7 AVICII (AGE 28)

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Also know as Tim Bergling, Avicii a Swedish DJ and musician, was found dead in Muscat, Oman, on April 20 2018. The cause of death was a suicide due to self-inflicted injuries. Some sources claimed he had died of blood loss after cutting himself with broken glass from a wine bottle.

 

“Well, just because you are rich and famous, this does not mean you do not suffer”. Tragically, the above mentioned stars, all proved this point to be accurate when they took their own lives, leaving us all in a lull, deliberating and implying “if only we’d known!” Losing a loved one to suicide is probably one of the most emotionally devastating experiences a person can go through. And when a “celebrity” commits suicide, then it is not just their family but the entire world that is left shocked and betrayed. On the surface it might seem like celebrities have perfect lives, courted by fame, wealth, and the adoration of fans. However, like every other human being, famous people too experience pains and disappointments albeit away from the public eye.

“If only had they not felt so alone, if only they’d called for help” – IF ONLY!”

WHAT IS SUICIDE 

As per the Internet and various other Government sites like National Institute of Mental Health and American Foundation for Suicide Prevention – Suicide is the act of “intentionally causing one’s own death”. The risk factors include mental disorders such as depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, personality disorders, and substance abuse – including alcoholism and the use of benzodiazepines. Other suicides are impulsive acts due to stress such as from financial difficulties, troubles with relationships, or bullying. There’s no single cause for suicide and it most often occurs when “stressors” and health issues converge to create an experience of hopelessness and despair. Depression, hence is the most common condition associated with suicide, and it is often dismally un-diagnosed or untreated. Incontrovertibly, conditions like depression, anxiety and substance problems, especially when unaddressed, increase risk for suicide.

Factually, suicides resulted in 828,000 global deaths in 2015, an increase from 712,000 deaths in 1990. This makes suicide the 10th leading cause of death worldwide! *bitter truth*

SUICIDE WARNING SIGNS

Something to look out for when concerned that a person may be suicidal is a change in behavior or the presence of entirely new behaviors. Most people who take their lives exhibit one or more warning signs, either through what they say or what they do. DO NOT miss the signs and be watchful of your loved ones! The behaviors listed below may be signs that someone is thinking about suicide –

Talking about wanting to die or wanting to kill themselves.
Talking about feeling empty, hopeless, or having no reason to live.
Talking about great guilt or shame.
Talking about feeling trapped or feeling that there are no solutions.
Talking about being a burden to others.
Using alcohol or drugs more often.
Acting anxious or agitated and withdrawing from family and friends.
Changing eating and/or sleeping habits.
Taking risks that could lead to death, such as reckless driving.
Displaying extreme mood swings, suddenly changing from very sad to very calm or happy.
Giving away important possessions.
Saying goodbye to friends and family.

HELP IS AROUND

Please know that asking someone about suicide is not harmful! There is a common myth that asking someone about suicide can put the idea into their head. This is not true. Several studies examining this concern have demonstrated that asking people about suicidal thoughts and behavior does not induce or increase such thoughts and experiences. In fact, asking someone directly, “Are you thinking of killing yourself,” can be the best way to identify someone at risk for suicide.

There are many ways to save a life and lend a hand. In the words of Stacey Freedenthal (PhD, LCS), the author of Helping the Suicidal Person: Tips and Techniques for Professionals. – 

“A society that tries to prevent suicide sends the message to people who suffer, and to those who love them, that their lives matter. That suicide is not the answer. That people care and can try to help.  That things have a good chance of getting better.”

If you or someone you know has warning signs or symptoms of suicide, particularly if there is a change in the behavior or a new behavior, get help as soon as possible.
Often, family and friends are the first ones to recognize the warning signs of suicide and can take the first “crucial” step towards helping an “at-risk individual” by finding treatment with someone who specializes in diagnosing and treating mental health conditions. Remember, if someone is telling you that they are going to kill themselves, do not leave them alone! Do not promise anyone that you will keep their suicidal thoughts a secret. Make sure to tell a trusted friend or family member, or if you are a student – an adult with whom you feel comfortable.

What if Someone Is Posting Suicidal Messages on Social Media? Knowing how to get help for a friend posting suicidal messages on social media can save a life. I repeat – be observant and aware! Many social media sites have a process to report suicidal content and get help for the person posting the message.

Facebook Suicide Prevention webpage can be found at www.facebook.com/help/594991777257121/[use the search term “suicide” or “suicide prevention”]

Instagram uses automated tools in the app to provide resources, which can also be found online at https://help.instagram.com [use the search term, “suicide,” self-injury,” or “suicide prevention”]

Twitter’s Best Practices in Dealing With Self-Harm and Suicide at https://support.twitter.com [use the search term “suicide,” “self-harm,” or “suicide prevention”].

If You Know Someone in Crisis –  Call the toll-free National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (NSPL) at 1–800–273–TALK (8255), its open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The service is available to everyone and all calls are confidential. The Crisis Text Line is another resource available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Text “HOME” to 741741.

Last but not the least, consider that someone who is thinking of suicide needs to feel understood. Let the person tell their story. Refrain from immediately trying to fix the situation or make the person feel better. These efforts, however well intended, can halt the conversation. Instead use phrases like –

“I’m so glad you told me that you’re thinking of suicide”, “I’m sad you’re hurting like this”, “What’s going on that makes you want to die?”, “What can I do to help?” ,“I care about you.” 

The motive is to let the person know that they can share and you for sure can listen! By telling the person about help that’s available and a simple statement of how much you care about or love the person can help nurture a sense of connection and you can help them to not feel so alone, helpless, or hopeless.

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PS – Your life matters! No one will be better off without you, even if it may seem otherwise.
Don’t just give up yet. There are a many ways to cope up with any trauma, damage or distress – all you need is a little patience, some faith, an honest friend and a plenty of “self belief!” Retrospect and remind yourself of all the times that you stood up and fought back in your past – this is not the end, the pain shall go away and you will “ARISE LIKE A  PHOENIX FROM THE ASHES!”

Here’s to never giving up – on our dreams and life!

Love,
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138 Comments

  1. Very sad to learn of her suicide as she had so many resources available and talent. I feel so sorry for her daughter. For the rest of us with much fewer resources, we must lift ourselves up by knowing who we are and accepting pitfalls and taking care of our mental health. Thanks for posting this as this is a tough subject to speak about.

    1. You are you right! We HAVE to lift ourselves and not give up on life.
      Thank you so much – trying to do my bit!

  2. A very well written and informative post about depression and suicide.Thanks a lot for generating more and more awareness about this mental illness.

    1. Thanks sweetie! 🙏
      Indeed, creating awareness is the first step towards any kind of revival and that’s what I intend to do.

      1. Yes that right. I published an anthology of seven poems based on sexual exploitation of women and published on mine and couple of other Lit collectives. Spreading awareness is the least we could do.

  3. Incredibly sad news about Kate Spade, and it furthers the fact that suicide and depression are far more complex than some think, that just because you ‘look fine’ or have a seemingly good life (job, money, family etc) it doesn’t mean that you are okay on the inside. A fantastic post and I great way to raise awareness while honouring some of the stars whose lives have tragically been lost to suicide. x

    1. Thank you so much. Appreciate it a lot!❤
      Exactly my thoughts too – Awareness, attention and consciousness is all we need to spread the word and to make this world a better place to live. 🙏

  4. It was super sad to learn about Kate yesterday. Terrible for her daughter. Your post is so well written and runs deep. Thank you for sharing your own struggles and saying no one is better off if one is dead. That made me ponder. Appreciate your thougths and this sincere share. Lots of hugs. Glad you are here for us.

    1. Thank you so much. Appreciate it a lot!❤
      World for sure can be a better place if we all try and do our bit. 🙏

    1. Thank you so much.. Just trying to do my bit.❤
      I was devastated by his death – It came in as a rude shock to me too! It still troubles me at nights when I think about all the “seemingly happy” people who’ve committed suicide. Ah, wish something could have be done!

  5. Richa ! The topic you touched is very sensitive, I say this because I have been through through severe depression, and once I even tried to end up my own life.. But something held me back.. “Who knows what gonna happen tomorrow – Don’t give up”.. So I understood what it’s all about, feeling isolated, not understood and a burden of family, friends and to the world..

    But yeah, once you are healed live is great, and blessed (All praise to Allah/GOD)

    1. That IS the PERFECT mantra Abdul – “Who knows what gonna happen tomorrow – Don’t give up”
      You’ve done great and I am sure that you’ll do great in future too! And I am so happy for you!❤
      Trust me, we all go through rough patches in our lives (and it does happen to even the best of us) – but the idea is to not feel alone and have a faith in oneself. “This too shall pass” – and your life is worth a lot more!
      May “Allah/GOD” bless you! Hugs!❤

      1. Yes Richa.. Those phase of Life is hard specially when everyone around you say – There is nothing called depression, It’s all a lie.. In those moments to stay positive is.. Really courageous 🔥

        1. Hats off to you for being so brave and for taking a stand for yourself! You for sure are an inspiration. I wish you all the happiness, love, luck and contentment in the world!❤

          1. I believe In the power of prayer ! The world calls it law of attraction.. But the power and believe in the prayer will rise up up high by the will of GOD/ALLAH..

            I wish you the same 7× ❤❤

    1. That plus self belief, efficacy and faith in oneself.
      Almighty also resides only in a heart filled with love for own.🙏

  6. I was not aware of Robin Williams’ attempted suicide case. I remember watching Jumanji when I was small where he played the part of Alan Parrish, and seriously he was such a wonderful actor. This is so heart wrenching.
    This post is a great effort in spreading awareness and I’m sure it’s going to help many👍

    1. Thank you so much sweetie. 🙏
      Raising awareness and spreading knowledge is the first step towards “saving a life” – I am glad that I could do my bit.

      PS – I was devastated by Robin Williams’ attempted suicide case – it literally broke my heart!

  7. Great in-depth post!❤️ Suicide is so prevalent—it’s sad! Even one more life saved makes it worth it!

    1. It is! And hence “we” have to tell anyone who’s suffering that – “this is not the end!”🙏
      All that any one needs is some hope – and we as society have to step up together to share that hope among each other. Amen!🙏

  8. Wow. What a very important topic to discuss. We tend to shy away from issues or disregard things. But this is real, suicide in my own country is particularly prevailing in young men. It’s so sad that they feel there’s no other way but to die. If only we could reach out to more people and help them.

    I am pleased you wrote about this emotive topic. I am happy to have read it and be more informed.

    1. Thank you so much!🙏
      Creating awareness and spreading knowledge is the first step towards any change/development. I am glad that my post is somewhere just doing that! ❤

  9. Hi Richa,

    I had similar posts about the same subject. Whitney Houston, Prince, Hit Ledger.They all killed themselves. That is very sad. I believe this happens in the absence of goals.We need new goal every day, and when people rich certain destination in life, they need a new goal.They need something to push them over the edge. They need motivation, which is energy for your soul !

    1. “They need motivation, which is energy for your soul!” – I agree to this statement 100%
      This and some compassion from others!🙏

  10. This was really a good post. And I mean it.
    Although, I really feel sorry for those people, but more sad because people don’t take these issues seriously. Despite so many awareness schemes, when someone is seen sad and depressed, all they get to hear is you are thinking too much or why do you always have to feel low. They don’t understand their situation and feelings.

    1. Thank you so much!❤
      Exactly, compassion and understanding is what we really NEED in this era. Wish if we could be more considerate of people and their lives, before judging them!

    1. And that is why it is important to know that you are not alone! As mentioned in my post – There are a many ways to cope up with any trauma, damage or distress – all you need is a little patience, some faith, an honest friend and a plenty of “self belief!”
      Remember, we have to fight for ourselves and believe in our strength.
      Love and hugs!❤
      PS – You always have “me” to speak to – every life matters!

  11. Thank you for posting this. My friend committed suicide and after the fact other people mentioned that he would bring up Robin Williams a lot to them. (It wasn’t long after Williams.) People put it off as shock but that was the method he ended his life with. I wish I had known what to look for then or paid more attention even a couple of years later its still hard to talk about.
    You put it into words much better than I could have.

    1. I hear you and I can understand as to how you must be feeling! Loss of a friend is a rude shock, that takes time and strength. Thank you for being so strong! (I pray for your peace of mind.)❤
      There are signs that we all miss, coz we refuse to even fathom that this could happen to the ones that we love or care about and hence, it is crucial to be aware and mindful of what’s going around us.

      Thank you so much for taking the time out to read. Really appreciate it. ❤

  12. Depression is real.. But some people brush it off saying it’s just a phase, he or she will get over it.. Until they actually get over it by killing themselves…

    1. I agree! And hence we HAVE to be aware of “mental issues” a person (any person) might/might not have. Suicide is not an epidemic, it’s mental illness that is as real as other issues and for sure can be treated.
      Thank you for stopping by sweetie!❤

  13. I hope you’ll better soon, dear. I felt sad for what happened to Kate Spade. Your post is a great help in raising awareness.

    1. Thank you so much sweetie, appreciate it!❤
      Ikr! I too was very sad by that news and hence the post – trying to raise awareness so that more and more people can save lives.

      1. Oh my! My sentence was incorrect 😁. It should have been ”I hope you’ll feel better soon.”

        You’re welcome, dear!

  14. It’s always such a question when seemingly successful people commit suicide. This was very thoughtful of you to write. Great tips and helpful information not just platitudes. Nice post 🙂

    1. Thank you so much. Appreciate it. 🙏
      Platitudes never did help anyone – sometimes you just have to indulge in the “REAL TALK”.

  15. Great and a very useful post Richa .It is wonderful that you are spreading the awareness, .I’m sure it will be helpful to many out there .Well done and hope you feel better soon as well. Have a good weekend!

    1. Thank you so much Nisha, appreciate you stopping by! Just trying to do my bit by spreading some awareness!❤
      You too have yourself a wonderful weekend! 🙂

  16. It’s very devastating to know someone who has lost a loved one because of suicide…. As far as I’ve seen, it’s mostly the rich people and famous people who face the problem of depression…. What we see is only the superficial self of these people…. Thank you for raising awareness🖤

    1. Depression can happen to the best of us and that is what is scary about it and hence, we HAVE to be aware of “mental issues” a person (any person) might/might not be going through. Sometimes, all it takes is “consciousness” and “alertness” to save a life.

      Thank you so much for stopping by, appreciate it!❤

  17. This is a very well researched post and I am so glad I read this. We can never know what’s going on in someone’s mind but we really need to be attentive to peoples emotions. Good one👌

  18. Great post on a tragic topic that the percentage rate is rising. It’s shocking to deal with in general, but when we see celebrities on the list, it’s even more surprising, assuming they have “everything.” As you said though, it’s not all about fame and fortune. They are humans, too, and struggle the same as we all do.
    My son’s friend committed suicide 8 years ago; he was only 14 years old. Outward appearances of him and his family were perfect. Needless to say, it was a shock, and he also hung himself, which is also hard to comprehend because its violent manner. Thanks, Erika, for raising awareness on this issue. I pray more people reach out for help instead of feeling there is only one way out. xo

    1. I so agree with you! This cannot be the only way out!
      I know, there are signs that we all miss, coz we refuse to even fathom the fact that this could happen to the ones that we love or care about and hence, it is crucial to be aware and mindful of what’s going around us.

      Thank you so much for taking the time out to read. Really appreciate it. ❤

  19. Wow, Richa bless your soul for this and for creating more awareness on such a sensitive issue.
    The kind of reality we live in today is far more different and worse than what it was like before.
    Your post has prompted me to also write something on suicide awareness

    1. We all have to do our bit – that’s the only way we can justify our presence! I am glad this post resonated with you.

      Oh yes, you should absolutely! Would love to read it.❤

  20. It’s always so baffling when someone successful commits suicide. Like you said, money and fame are obviously not the keys to happiness. Since you posted this, Anthony Bourdain committed suicide. Such tragic events.

    1. Tragic of course Aixa!

      Depression can happen to the best of us and that is what is scary about it and hence, we HAVE to be aware of “mental issues” a person (any person) might/might not be going through. Sometimes, all it takes is “consciousness” and “alertness” to save a life.

      Thank you so much for stopping by, really appreciate it!❤

  21. Thank you for spreading awareness .. I see you saw my posts about the young man in my community that. Took his life … it’s just needs to stop .. people need to know this is not the answer…

  22. This is such an important topic . people often avoid talking about suicide because of its sensitive nature, but they don’t realize how important talking is and the difference it makes.
    I hadn’t known Marilyn Monroe committed suicide.

    1. Exactly my thoughts too – Awareness, attention and consciousness is all we need to spread the word and to make this world a better place to live. 🙏

      About Marilyn Monroe – They say it’s a probable suicide – due to stress and controversies that constantly weighed her down! 🙁

    1. I agree – awareness is the key! It’s an old post (Junish kinds) had re-blogged this for Suicide Awareness Week (Sep 9 – Sep 15)

      Thank you so much for stopping by though!❤

  23. An absolutely valuable post..you expressed it very well . …there’s so much emotion embedded in this in post.You described that sad reality very much lucidily, yet touchingly I love it. I want to appreciate you for posting this wonderful post . I’ve been graced by this amazing blogger entering my blog as follower.

    1. Thank you so much.❤️
      Awareness is what we all need.

      PS – The feelings are mutual! It’s a pleasure to read your heartfelt musings! 🙂

  24. Richa thank you for your courage to write about such a difficult, but very serious topic. I lost my dad to suicide as a teen and it hit me hard. The year ti two years following his death were the hardest. My dad and I were close, he was a wonderful husband, son, father, and man who suffered from a mental illness. He is forever and always in my heart and reconnecting with my creative passions of drawing and writing I know he smiles proudly watching over me every day. ❤️✨❤️ Thank you for bringing more awareness into world. It is something I also strive to do with working with students and schools in my community.

    1. I hear you and I can understand as to how it must feel! Loss of a family member is a rude shock, that takes time, courage and strength to heal.
      Thank you for being so strong and for being such an amazing “positive” person that you are! (I pray for your peace of mind and serenity.)❤
      I agree – There are signs that we all miss, coz we refuse to even fathom that this could happen to the ones that we love or care about and hence, it is crucial to be aware and mindful of what’s going around us. (And hence this post to create awareness)

      Thank you so much for taking the time out to read. Really appreciate it. ❤

        1. You are an inspiration and I really admire you for your resilience!❤

          Here’s something that I wanted to add –
          “Life has moments that feel as if the sun has blackened to tar and the entire world turned to ice. It feels as if Hades and his vile demons have risen from the depths of Tartarus solely for the purpose of banding to personally torture you, and that their genuine intent of mental, emotional, and spiritual anguish is tearing you to shreds. Your heart weighs as heavily as leaden legs which you would drag yourself forward with if not for the quicksand that pulls you down inch by inch, paralyzing your will and threatening oblivion. And all the while fire and brimstone pour from the sky, pelting only you.
          Truly, that is what it feels like. But that feeling is a trial that won’t last forever. Never give up.”
          ― Richelle E. Goodrich, Smile Anyway

          1. Thank you for the addition, it is a reminder we all need in moments of darkness that seems like it will never end…as they say there is light at the end of the tunnel.😊❤️

      1. Aaaaaa yoooooo!

        thats crazy!

        I knew I noticed this pattern and you sent it to me…

        Thank you cuz you just made me feel smart.

        lol😂

        But this is incredible research!

        well its bad but the r…

        you no what I mean… 😊

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